Saturday, July 24, 2010
Saturday, July 17, 2010
He looks like a white cat with orange markings, but he feels like a rabbit.
He likes to sit at the sliding glass door and chirp at the goldfinches and bravely run away if you happen to open the door.
(and sir robin ran away) ahem.
He is not going to be traveling to our next home with us.
He must be a Rent - a - Cat for the next 12 - 24 months.
perhaps even longer, depending on how long before we find a more, permanent home for us Clausen people. Which will depend upon housing markets and the like.
Please be praying about our little situation.
Medium is in tears over it all. (a teary "we're not gonna move if Tyler cannot go with us")
Tall is very sad but gets the bigger picture of cat rental and all that. (Did I mention she has catbox duty, so that would (temporarily) go away for her, yeah, that makes it easier!)
Small won't really get it.
Parentals units ; sad , but adjusting. I mean, he can come back when we buy again. :)
anyway, it is one for the prayer list. and quickly too... we need to move in 28 days.
oh man, I better start packing. organizing and packing. and planning. and packing.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Tomatoes; 12 plants, already snacking on bi-color cherry. Several large green tomatoes.
Bush Sugar Peas; I uprooted them, they were all dried aned withery. Snacked on plenty, have a better planting plan for next year.
Turnips; Have eated them twice, waiting on the last few to get B I G, will replant soon for fall crop.
Beets: Very small, tops eaten up by rabbits, even with row cover. Different plan for fall.
Strawberries; 4 plants, putting out fruit again this year. :) LIKE.
Brussel Sprouts: 5 plants, growing well.
Honeydew Melon: 5 plants, growing well.
Bush Cucumber: 3 plants, moving along, have picked 5 small fruits.
Blueberry bushes: 2 dwarf potted; growing well. 3 inground; growing.
Blackberry: 1 growing along.
Bush Beans: 2 Earthboxes: over 6 pounds. they seem to have stopped producing and leaves are demolished by Japanese beetles. Replanting for more harvest. Earthbox Win.
Corn: has bugs. ew. and very few ears. Earthbox fail.
Eggplant: 2 plants in self watering buckets; 1 has 5 new fruits growing, the other is still smallish.
next year; start seeds 2 weeks earlier. Also, self watering for overwinter this year. :)
Banana Peppers: 2 plants in same pot, doing well, a few small fruits. Start seeds earlier next year.
Indeterminate Tomatoes: 4 boxes = 8 plants on deck;. growing fabulously. possibly have as much green fruit right now, as I had all last season! Go Earthboxes!
Mr Stripey Tomato plant = just aquired, growing!
Peppers: 2 tiny Doux deEspagne, start seeds earlier next year. 1 Sweet Red bell, covered in fruits. 1 sweet Orange bell, just aquired, growing.
Thats all for now, besides some lovely Sage.
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
His ways are not our ways.
I really don't know how to write or not write this post.
Wednesday July 7th and someone is missing.
This is the day we should have been having our little one.
Welcoming our precious 4th child into our family here on earth.
But we aren't.
Seriously, our baby was due July 1oth. We would have picked a date for a C-section and this would have been it. 7 - 7 - 2010.
I cannot get past this sadness, this lacking.
I drove home from the hospital 7 months ago with empty arms. weeping and mourning.
My heart continues to mourn.
Most days I want to post something and cannot. I have started many posts since December and not finished them or posted them.
Thinking about the little one we don't have with us is torturous.
Thinking there will not be another is inconceivable. Pun intended.
Why is unanswerable.
How is it that I begged them NOT to destroy my tube and they cauterized it closed?
(yeah, they say saving my life; blah, blah. As a mom, what about my babies' life? why couldn't we save it?)
How is it that our healthcare pays for the death of the unborn, but NOT InVitro to help the inconceivable be conceived.
How can it be that Death is the end of our fertility, our blessing(s)?
Most days, I simply try to smile and have fun with our children. Pressing this ache far far below the surface ... intangible to most, out of reach to all.
It surfaces. I try not to dwell in it. I push it aside, I move along with the next moment.
It simply does not go away. ever.
Ten fingers, ten toes, I should be counting them today, yet I cannot, until I meet you in heaven.
Precious Cadence Selah,
Today we were supposed to meet you face to face. We all wanted you here.
We all miss you.
Love, Mommy & Daddy, big sister & brothers.
Miraculous conception = we believe You for it Lord.